


Cache Me Outside - Galaxy Wars Edition

by ekayla



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M, Gen, Rose Tico wrote this fanfiction for Rey in my textfic, This is a crack fic, anyways read matched, fic in a fic, fic-ception, my Rose doesn't know Galaxy Wars so it's gonna be stupid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-10
Updated: 2020-08-10
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:34:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25831402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ekayla/pseuds/ekayla
Summary: Rose Tico, Harry Potter nerd and fanfiction writer, wrote this little fic for Rey Johnson in my textfic Matched.--Kira takes Kylo Ren geocaching for the first time, shenanigans ensue. Enjoy!
Relationships: Kira/Kylo Ren
Comments: 4
Kudos: 10





	Cache Me Outside - Galaxy Wars Edition

It was a cool September day, the sun was out, and Lily and Kylo Ren sat across from each other in a booth at Starbucks. They were both sipping on their drinks with a plate of croissants in between them. Kylo’s caramel latte left a bit of foam on his upper lip, and wordlessly Lily pointed at him, in an effort to get him to wipe it off. But of course, he didn’t understand, and just before Lily could clarify anything, Kira plopped down in the booth next to Kylo Ren.

“I have the most  _ brilliant _ idea for us to do this afternoon.” She looked to Kylo Ren, who still had the foam mustache. She made a face, and pointed to her own upper lip. “You know you have a little…” Kylo’s face flushed pink as he quickly cleaned his mouth with the back of his sleeve. A smile flashed on Kira’s face before she continued, turning to Lily. “Geocaching. I used to do it with my parents, but not so much anymore. Have you ever been?”

Lily nodded. “Yeah, I used to do it a lot while living with my aunt and uncle. I mostly just wanted to get out of the house, they were horrible.” She shuttered. “Anyway, it’s pretty fun. A bit of adventure.”

Suddenly they are interrupted by a slurping sound. Lily and Kira turned to Kylo, who was now staring at them with wide eyes, finishing off his latte. “What?”

Kira rolled her eyes. “Have you ever been? Geocaching?”

“Never heard of it.” He shoved one end of a croissant in his mouth, leaving crumbs all over the space on the table in front of him.

A shocked look ran across Kira’s face, just before she realized the obvious. “Oh, I guess that makes sense. It’s more of a Light Side thing.” She took a croissant from the plate and took a small gentle bite, but waited to swallow before speaking again. “Well, I think it would be really fun. Like Lily said, an adventure,” she beamed before taking another bite.

“Well, alright, I’m down for an adventure,” Kylo said through his stuffed mouth, looking between the girls. “I’m getting bored with the Dark Side anyways.” 

“Yeah, I’m game too. It’ll be a nice break from dealing with Snoke. I don’t think R2D2 will mind us exploring this afternoon.”

“Wonderful! Alright, so I’ve got it all planned out…” Kira set the croissant down and immediately started pulling things out of her bag and setting them on the table. A map, a compass, a notebook, multiple different colored pens, a binocular, a small device… Lily and Kylo exchanged glances, as if saying  _ Oh no, what have we gotten ourselves into?  _ Kylo Ren shoved another croissant in his mouth and Lily took a big gulp of her drink.

“…and this will tell us exactly where it is!” She finished, pointing at the device in her hand with exact coordinates of an unknown location.

Kylo Ren swallowed his food. “So what exactly  _ is _ geocaching, though?”

“Oh, right.” Kira laughed. “Well, according to the official website, you select a geocache to locate, plug it into this device, then you use it to navigate to the location! It’s pretty simple really.” She stated, as if Kylo should have known this.

Kylo furrowed his brow. “Okay, but what happens when you find it? Do you win a prize, like being able to rule the galaxy or something?”

Lily opened her mouth to start to speak, but Kira unknowingly cut her off. “It’s usually a small container of some sort, a box of some kind, and you open it to find all sorts of little things that people have left. The tradition is that you look at all the things, then place something of your own inside for the rest of the explorers to find!”

Kylo shrugged his shoulders. “Hmm, sounds fun enough. Would be better with galaxy domination though.”

“Yeah, or maybe Vader’s lightsaber!” Lily and Kylo Ren burst out laughing at this.

Once again, Kira rolled her eyes, starting to wonder why she hung out with them. “Alright, well let’s go!” She started collecting everything back into her bag. Lily finished off her drink while Kylo Ren sneakily stole the rest of Kira’s croissant. However, Kylo was not as sneaky as he thought himself to be, and she noticed, but only responded with a half-smile and a small head shake. And with that, they headed out on their adventure.

\--

The planet they were currently on, Tapir 3, of no relation to the Earthly animal, was a planet with a population of about 15,000. They happened to be passing through on the way back to the Rebel Base. Fortunately for the trio, it bordered several farmlands, fields and cottages, all land that would be perfect for hiding a geocache. The group headed out towards the land, Kira leading the way.

They walked out of civilization, houses becoming less and less, sidewalks becoming dirt paths, until they were surrounded by grass tickling their shins and trees are scattered throughout the field. 

Kira stopped, staring at her GPS device, and suddenly hit the side of it with her palm. “Great! The GPS stopped working,” she grumbled. Tossing it into her bag, she took out the paper map. “Guess we’ll have to use this!” She sounded much more cheerful than Kylo and Lily would like.

Kylo Ren groaned and rolled his eyes. “Remind me again why we can’t just use the Force?” His saber was in his back pocket, where Kira made him put it not long after they left the Starbucks. When Kylo Ren first asked if the Force could be used, Kira had scoffed and said “Of course not! Finding it on our own, with our own skills, that’s part of the adventure!” Kylo Ren had groaned and rolled his eyes then, too.

“Because, it would-” she started, but Lily and Kylo Ren interrupted, finishing her sentence.

“-ruin the adventure.” They sighed together, in a somewhat mocking tone.

“We got it.” Lily said to Kira, who was just shaking her head.

Kira looked back down at her map and scrunched her nose as she tried to figure out the direction they needed to go next. Kylo sat down on a rock and drew in the dirt with a stick he found somewhere along the way. Lily looked down and noticed a porg in the tall grass close to the path, and had an idea. She glanced up to make sure the others weren’t paying attention before opening her mouth.

“Meeeeeeeeeeep” she whispered to the porg. It turned to her, and their eyes met. The porg nodded, and began to waddle on the grass next to the path. “waaaaaaaaaa” Lily continued, and the porg moved over to the taller grass, more hidden.

“It’s this way!” Kira shouted suddenly, jolting Lily’s attention off her new friend in the grass. Kylo jerked up, too, from his drawing. She pointed towards a hilly area in the east and started walking with purpose. Kylo Ren jumped up, and tried to catch up with her. Lily just walked casually, not worried about getting lost.

They continued to walk along the path, as it winded in and around the greenery. Trees that were once sparse and spread out were now beginning to populate more near the edge of the trail, bringing shade to the group as they walked. Kira’s eyes continuously went from her map to the landscape, over and over again, making sure they stayed on the right path. Lily whispered to her waddling friend, who was still following them in the side grass. She had tried to be quiet, but Kylo Ren caught her.

“What was that, Lily?” he asked, without looking at her.

“Oh, um, I was just talking to myself. Wondering if the geocache could be in the tall grass, that’s all,” she flustered.

Kylo Ren said a little louder, hoping for Kira to hear, “I just wish we could use the Force! Or, we could just have C3PO find the geocache and bring it to us. Droids know the location of everything.”

Kira slowed and turned her head over her shoulder to scold him. “Kylo Ren, that would take away all the fun!”

“Newsflash, Kira, I’m not  _ having _ any fun. I’m just walking amongst trees and grass in the hot bloody sun, probably getting very burnt.” He smacked the back of his neck with his hand, then looked at it. “And now I’m being attacked by bugs. Great.” Kylo looked around to see if anyone else was being bitten, and noticed that it’s only him and Kira walking on the path. “Kira, where’s Lily?”

“What do you mean? Lily’s just behind you…” She stopped and turned around fully. “Isn’t she?” They both looked around and Lily was nowhere to be found.

“Lily?” Kylo Ren called, pausing to listen for a response.

Several feet down, they heard leaves beginning to shake in one of the trees. Kylo Ren and Kira cautiously walked towards it. When they peered into the branches, they saw Lily, perched on one of the branches.

Kira placed her hands on her hips. “Lily, what on earth are you doing up there?”

“Looking for the geocache,” she stated, as if it should be obvious.

“In a tree??”

Kylo grabbed a branch and began to climb up to Lily’s level.

“And just what do you think you’re doing, Kylo Ren?”

He glanced up at Lily, then down to Kira. “I guess I'm looking for the geocache.” He continued to climb until he was on the branch opposite of Lily. They both sat there with their legs hanging. “I don’t know, I’m still learning how to do this.” Smiling, he turned to Lily. “What do we do next?”

Lily looked around at the leaves, pondering her response. “I dunno, just look around for a box, I guess. That’s what I always did when I looked for them.” They both turned their heads all around, but found nothing. They shrugged their shoulders at each other before starting down the tree.

At the bottom, Kira was waiting with her map. “Why would it even be in a tree? We aren’t close enough yet to the coordinates, I have it marked right here on my map!” She pointed and shoved it in their faces.

“Okay, okay, let’s get on then.” Lily moaned.

They continued walking, Kira leading the way.

“What if we get there, and it’s gone?” Kylo Ren asked the two more experienced searchers.

“That’s never happened to me before, it will be there.” Kira nodded confidently.

Both shrugged at each other, hoping that the geocache will in fact still be there.

Soon enough, they reached a point where the path forked. Kira checked her map, scratching her head while she compared it to her surroundings. Lily walked a little bit away from Kylo and Kira. She whispered to the tall grass in a low voice.

“Meeeerpleeee,” she asked. The porg appeared, poking its head out between the blades.

“Weeeeeerp” it responded, then disappeared into the grass once again. Lily walked back over to Kira and Kylo Ren, who were arguing.

“Let’s just fix your GPS, I can do it with the Force!”

“No! I am NOT letting you try and fix it, you will just break it even more!”

“Will not, let me try!”

She opened her mouth to speak, but then closed it and handed Kylo Ren the broken GPS. “Fine,” she spat.

Kylo Ren held the device out from his body, raised his hand and closed his eyes. After a minute, he squeezed them tight, concentrating even more.

Nothing happened.

Suddenly, a small sound escaped his body. Kylo didn’t notice, but Kira does and she doubled over in laughter, clutching her abdomen. “You… You…” She tried unsuccessfully to get the words out, but she was out of breath.

Lily, grinning from ear to ear, walked up to Kylo Ren and placed a hand on his shoulder.

“What?” Kylo Ren baffled, turning to look at Lily.

She let out a stifled laugh before finally speaking. “You farted.”

Red flooded to his face as Kylo Ren’s eyes widened and darted to the ground, before his free hand covered his forehead. “Oh bloody hell.” He threw the broken device to the side.

“Don’t worry about it, Kylo Ren, we all do it.” Lily continued. “Just some quieter than others.” She and Kira burst into laughter again. “Besides, I know where we are going, we don’t need that GPS.” 

Kira spun around. “You can’t possibly know, you don’t have a map, or anything!”

Lily nonchalantly shrugged and began to walk to the right path. Kylo Ren picked up and handed Kira the broken device, then followed Lily. She waited a moment, stunned, then quickly threw the device in her bag and caught up to them.

They walked for a little while, Lily leading the way this time, Kira still checking her map, but a little less. She eventually placed it back in her bag, still within reach if she needed it, but wanting to trust her friend. Soon enough, they arrived at the base of a large tree, tall and waving in the cool autumn breeze. Some of the leaves were already browning, while some were holding onto their summer color.

“Alright, so what do we do now?” Kylo Ren asked, peering up into the branches. He pointed upward. “Climb it?”

“ _ No _ . We do  _ not _ need to climb anymore trees,” Kira groaned. “Now we just need to search around. These are the coordinates, so it should be close.”

They all began to inspect the base of the tree, ruffling through the small piles of leaves. After about 10 minutes, Kylo Ren kicked up a rock and saw something small and light brown. He used his hands to move away the rest of the forest floor to find what appears to be a small chest. It was about thirty-five centimeters by twenty centimeters, and twenty centimeters deep. Big enough to fit a handful of items, yet able to be hidden amongst the rocks by the base of the tree.

“I think I found something!” He shouted to Lily and Kira, who are on the other side of the trunk. They rushed over to his side. “It’s an old chest, is this what we are looking for?”

“Brilliant, Kylo Ren!”

Then, out of the blue, Luke Skywalker hopped down out of the tree, startling the trio.

“Hi, Lily. Hi, Kylo Ren. Hi, Kira.” He greeted them individually, in his gruff voice.

“Luna? What are you doing here?” Lily tilted her head and squinted at him like he had three eyes.

“Geocaching, of course.” He replied, moving slowly around him. “Oh! I see that you found the box!” With his hands clasped behind his back, he leaned forward to inspect it. “Looks like this one hasn’t been found in quite some time.” He stood up straight and looked between Lily and Kira. “Shall we open it?”

Kylo Ren, Kira, and Lily exchanged glances before wordlessly deciding to go ahead. Lily motioned to Kylo to open the box. “After all, you found it.”

Kylo squatted down and lifted the lid. It opened with almost no effort, which surprised the group. Kylo started to pull out the items stored in the chest. A pencil, a small notebook, a baby shoe, a cube with colorful squares all over its sides, a light purple crystal, a toy soldier, Darth Vader’s mask, the ace of spades playing card, a seven of hearts, and a Ziplock bag of peanuts.

“This is the most random collection of things I’ve ever seen.” Kylo said as he picked up the bag of peanuts. Kira shot daggers at him with her eyes, as if saying  _ don’t you dare eat those nuts, you don’t know where they’ve been!  _ He slowly lowered the bag back to the pile of items. Kira could be scary when she needed to be.

“Ooo, this is pretty!” Luke picked up the mask and placed it on his face. Kylo felt a twisting in his stomach looking at the mask, but shook it off quickly. Lily reaches for the cube.

“Oh hey, a Rubik’s cube! I had one of these when I was a kid. I could solve it in under a minute. I wonder if I still can…” Her words trailed off as her hands began to speed up, twisting and shifting the block. Kylo Ren stared at her hands working, enthralled by this new puzzle.

Kira picked up the pencil and pad, jotting down the date and all of their names, including Luke. She still wasn’t sure how he ended up here, but one couldn’t really know for sure about anything with Luke. He was an enigma that Kira doesn’t have the time or energy to figure out, not with all the rest that’s going on with the First Order.

“Well, I suppose we should put our items inside.” Kira said when she finished writing. “What do you all have to contribute?”

Kylo frowned, before digging into his pocket and pulling out a pair of gold dice. He placed it into the box, then passed Lily a glance. Lily took out the lightsaber of Anakin Skywalker from her pocket, to everyone’s surprise, and tossed it into the box.

“Wait, I thought that was destroyed?” Kylo Ren raised a brow.

“It was, but then I put it back together.” Lily tapped the side of her temple with her index finger. Kylo Ren nodded and pursed his lips, understanding.

Kira put her broken GPS device inside. “Maybe it will work for someone else.” She shoved her hands in her pockets. Everyone turned to Luke, who was still wearing the mask. He took it off, put it in the box, while adding a pair of neon blue and green sunglasses.

Luke closed the box, then gently put it back where Kylo Ren found it. He covered it up with some moss and leaves, hiding it from plain sight. After brushing off his hands, he turned to the group. “Well, I’m off to feed a nettlespeller!” The gang exchanged glances, and by the time they looked back at Luke, he was gone.

“That was…weird,” Kira said.

They all started walking back down towards the path, and back towards town. Kylo mumbled something about never wanting to go geocaching again, and while Kira spouted out all the benefits of including it as enrichment to one’s life, Lily actually agreed with Kylo Ren. Some things are best only done once. 

Not long after they left the tree, another visitor showed up just where they were. Snoke materializes; he glanced around to make sure he was alone, then took out the box from its hidden place. He took the mask, slammed it shut, tossed it back into the leaves, then vanished into thin air.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading my fanfic inception! Here is the textfic if you are interested ;) [Matched, a textfic](https://twitter.com/blarkefart/status/1250527940648906752)
> 
> Follow me on twitter!


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